Sunday, 27 September 2009

The Quest for the Perfect Teapot

The Holy Grail. The Golden Fleece. A way home to Kansas from Oz. The destruction of the One Ring.
All of these great quests have one thing in common (I think, although I'm not 100% on whether anybody DID find the Holy Grail).
Our hero or heroine was successful.
However, there is one quest which I honestly believed has eluded every single person, young or old, male or female, who enjoys that greatest of British traditions - the cup of tea - for millennia and will continue to do so for eternity.
A teapot which doesn't drip.
Seriously, we have been glugging down the stuff on a daily basis for thousands of years. We have been to the moon (allegedly), found ways to treat and cure some of the most terrible diseases in the world and created rock music.
Yet even the best scientists on earth are incapable of coming up with a teapot design which stops half the heavenly brew ending up all over your worktop or tablecloth the second you tip the thing up.
I know this as my mother has been on such a quest for as long as I can remember and, when I moved out, passed the mantle on to me.
Chrome, steel, clay, long-spouted, short-spouted, patterned, plain, large or small, at home or in a cafe, I've tried them all and not a single pot on this earth can decant its contents into a cup or mug without dripping dark amber spots in places you don't want them.
Why is it so unachievable?! It must be possible! Somebody, somewhere must be able to make a teapot that doesn't drip?!
Maybe its a lack of funding for the research which, if that is the case, I have an idea.
Rather than all these countries spending billions of pounds making and storing weapons of mass destruction, Britain and the US included, they should stop their nuclear programmes and pump the money instead into creating the perfect receptacle in which to brew up the best drink in the world.
Think about it. All the world leaders can then sit down and have a good old chat over a cuppa and make friends. Because everybody knows a nice brew makes everything alright.
Just a thought...

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